Trekking Into My Fear Of Success

I was afraid of what I could do if I succeeded.

I was completely happy in my routine of misery. Waking up, worrying, taking care of Sammy, and being the victim of the circumstances of my situation and not wanting to change. I knew deep down I had potential but I was afraid of failing or worse the work I would have to do to succeed. I mean if I succeeded that would mean I spent all the previous years being a waste, might as well not face that and keep on existing. 

Things have changed since then. As I sat in my first class since 2006 I realized how big of a journey I had taken. Listening to my teacher and what was expected of us, I’m not gonna lie I got scared. Papers every week and a major 2000 word project at the end of the semester. Shit, I haven’t done this in forever I stepped in over my head. Those were thoughts bubbling up in my head, but then I realized that it’s when things get hard that I dig deeper and flourish! That I wasn’t that same person who was happy to let her fear stop her from her own success. No, I’m the strong powerful and confident woman who is ready to take this advanced class on, no matter how long it’s been! 

Michael Burnham was happy with the status quo of her being a traitor and prisoner to the Federation. It wasn’t until the USS Discovery came and Captain Lorca started to make Michael push outside her norm and fight for the potential he knew she had, that she rose above her fares and helped save the Federation and stop the war with the Klingons. 

Have you let your fear of succeeding stop you?